Stack Daily Habits For Enduring Change

How bundling small improvements can add up to big progress.

As we continue our Summer of Change series, it’s time to focus on the long game. It might be scorching hot outside, but we’re slipping on our lab coats for this one. 

We’ve already established that fear is the monster that prevents us from pursuing change and that people-pleasing is our primary progress blocker.

So, habit formation (or lack thereof) is the endurance eliminator. Similar to how New Year’s resolutions are often quickly abandoned, many changes don’t stick because enthusiasm and motivation fizzle out.

The four stages of habit formation.

Studies suggest that it takes anywhere from 18 days to 36 weeks to create a new habit (Mosunic). This large discrepancy in time considers different personality types and how complex the change is. 

Let’s look at work-life balance as an example. It will be easier for you to permanently incorporate a 15-minute afternoon break into your routine than it will be to stop checking your emails on weekends. Some changes are less difficult to incorporate because they don’t impact you and your former routines as much. 

First, it’s important to understand the role brain patterns play. Regardless of your personality or the complexity of the change you wish to make, there are four stages of habit formation.

Cue: The cue (or trigger) is the starting point of the habit loop. To continue the work-life balance example, you are accustomed to constantly checking your email during the work week. You’ve tried to stop checking your email over the weekend. Now, it’s Sunday morning and you haven’t looked at your inbox since Friday.

Craving: The craving is the motivational force behind the habit. The unknown is gnawing at you, you’re anxious, and you don’t feel in control. You have no idea what emails may be waiting for you when you finally check. You’re thinking “Did that client ever get back to me?” or “What if something urgent happened?” 

Response: The response is the actual behavior, or habit, that is performed to fulfill the craving. You’ve convinced yourself that you can check your email on a Saturday because it will only take a second and you’re thinking “What’s the harm?” The harm is that you break out of “life” mindset and shift into “work” mode. 

Reward: The reward is the benefit or satisfaction gained through the response. As you read through your emails, you feel relieved. The client did respond, there’s nothing urgent, and no one needed your immediate attention this weekend. Yes, you could have just waited until tomorrow.

The psychology behind why habit-stacking works.

Humans are creatures of habit, and our brains are wired for recognition. Current behaviors already have well-established neuronal connections.

When trying to make a change, you have to blaze a fresh trail in a new neural network. However, when you piggyback a change onto an existing habit, you multitask the pre-beaten path, which is much easier!

Additionally, your “new” habit gets a built-in reminder by latching on to the old one. For example, when you feel triggered to check your work email, go to your personal one instead. Then, send a funny “thinking of you” message to a friend instead of snapping back into work mode.

Start small: Incorporate simple changes for quick wins. “I’ll do 10 squats every time I brush my teeth.”

Stay realistic: Consistency with change is more effective than duration. You don’t need to set unrealistic and seemingly impossible goals for yourself. 

Set a timeline: You feel less motivated to work on open-ended goals. Let a change settle for three weeks before you try stacking another.

Celebrate progress: Reward yourself periodically. Recognize that you’re changing goals into entrenched habits.

Ready, set, stack ‘em up!

So, let’s put all of the above into practice by illustrating it with a mock six-month plan. We’ll elaborate on the examples from above and use a common big-picture vision of striking a better work-life balance while establishing a healthier lifestyle.

Week 1: Do 10 squats while brushing your teeth every morning.

Week 3: Do 10 squats while brushing your teeth. Apply a moisturizer with sunscreen.

Week 6: Do 10 squats while brushing your teeth. Apply a moisturizer with sunscreen. Listen to an uplifting podcast while you do the rest of your tasks to get ready for the day.

Week 9: Everything from the previous weeks, plus switch your second cup of coffee to half-caffeine. Treat yourself to a fun new coffee mug to create some excitement!

Week 12: Everything from the previous weeks, plus switch your second cup of half-caffeine coffee to green tea and drink an additional glass of water after you finish your tea.

Week 15: Everything from the previous weeks, but now you’re going to commit to one standing phone date with a friend while you go for a walk in the afternoon or even during your lunch break. Once a week, this gives you that reconnection you crave, keeps you away from your desk, and offers an opportunity to get outside for some fresh air. If someone’s expecting your call, you’ll make it happen, and you’ll hardly even notice you’re exercising. But your body, mind, and soul definitely will. You’ll come back energized from the physical activity and social engagement. You can even treat yourself with a new pair of running shoes! 

Week 18: Everything from the previous weeks, plus try to get out for that walk-and-chat (or walk-and-podcast) most days. Let this habit sink in as it’s a significant change from the days when you worked straight through the day at your desk with no breaks to get outside or be active. 

Week 21: Everything from the previous weeks, plus join a professional networking group. And of course we just so happen to know the perfect one.

Week 24: Everything from the previous weeks, plus declare after dinner as work-free family time. Whenever you’re tempted to check your email, check in with a friend, your partner, or even your kids to reconnect with your life and relationships outside of work. 

Week 27: Everything from the previous weeks, plus extend your work-free zone in the evenings to weekends. Maybe you can even plan a weekend trip with a friend or your family as a reward for all your hard work and successful changes.  

Now, six months have passed and your work-life balance, health, and relationships are all significantly different! All by taking baby steps in the right direction and stacking habits for enduring change. We understand that a lot of change can be scary and overwhelming. We aren’t necessarily suggesting that you should change every part of your life in the next six months. However, regardless of what your goals are, habit stacking has the power to help you reach them! 

If you need a group of like-minded people who can support you and help you feel accountable for your professional goals, you don’t need to keep looking! You can join Arise for a supportive group of nanny agency owners who are ready to welcome you with open arms and provide the encouragement and inspiration to make the change that you’ve been waiting for!

“Thank you again for pouring so much into us; it has made a huge difference in my life.” – Eugenia S., Owner, District Sitter